#if only they were a little better at communicating
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Eh okay so. My brain is absolutely cooked so you will probably just have to ignore the linguistic fuckups
Jazz and Prowl learning to communicate because language barrier is a thing >:D
Previous part
Jazz sometimes thinks that somewhere along his career path he lost the bar separating normal from...well...everything else.
After all he's seen, heard about, and done, he's not sure exactly how to measure what's weird and what's normal. He has..the general idea.
His own. And it's so convoluted and fucked up that he'd rather jump into a volcano than try to explain it to anyone else. Jazz thinks the little colorful aliens around him are weird as hell. He thinks they sound weird, he thinks they look weird, and he thinks he must be going crazy.
And then this big black and white robot catches his eye and Jazz's first thought is not "what the fuck??"
His first thought is
"Thank God! Someone's normal!"
Whoever this guy is, he sounds like he knows what he's doing. And most importantly, he looks just like Jazz. Well, not exactly. But close enough. After all, Jazz knows that his organization wasn't the only mech maker on the entire planet. Other countries were making Mechs too, and Jazz hadn't seen even half of them.
But he can recognize a giant robot when he sees one, okay?
The thought that another mech could be an alien doesn't even enter his mind.
So used to the constant presence of huge piloted robots around him, he looks at this one and clings to its appearance as something familiar and easily explainable. His brain says, we know how this works. There's a robot and inside the robot there's another person. It's the way it's always been. The sky is blue, the grass is green and the robots are human-piloted. It's that simple.
The guy takes him to the far corner of the room and says something. Jazz…doesn't understand..
The mech's face contorts in a surprisingly believable display of concentration. How...who built this robot? How could they make it frown?
He hears something else being said to him but again can't understand a word. Why won't this pilot get out of the mech to talk to him? Jazz doesn't have his communication frequency but surely they could at least shake hands. There must be some reason. Maybe something wrong with the air? Is it dangerous to be outside? This guy should know better, he's been here longer than Jazz, it seems.
(Damn it, whose idea was it to make a mech with a face, it's so distracting)
He rushes to activate the external speakers, because he and this guy obviously speak different languages, but it never hurts to try, right?
"So uh, I don't think you can understand English?"
Mech frowns again, trying to pick up on something familiar in a language that's apparently new to him. But finds nothing. Jazz lowers his horns sadly.
Oh well. Fuck. As if being stuck in an unknown place with unknown creatures wasn't enough, he can't even talk to anyone! How is he supposed to get out of here? Which way should he even go?
The mech waves his hand to get his attention and then pulls out a tablet and a stylus from..where ?
Jazz somehow manages to overlook the fact that the tablet is made to fit the mech's size. His head is still feels a bit…off..after that portal thingie.
"Charades it is then."
____________________
An hour and a half later, Jazz finds himself staring intensely at the screen in front of him with a surprisingly neatly drawn chart on it.
"So uh. Motion."
The other guy nods and starts drawing a walking mech. Then something that looks like a very unusual car. Then a submarine. Jazz gets a little lost looking at how skillful he is with the stylus.
Honestly, he's a good artist!
The guy points to the sketch of a walking mech and says
" Motion."
Then points to the drawing of a car driving and the columns of the chart.
"Motion-rotation" he points to the car again.
That must mean "driving" huh? Jazz nods understandingly.
Mech moves his finger to the submarine.
"Motion-Water."
Ah, it must mean swimming. Jazz nods once more, feeling like a wind-up dummy repeating the same motion a dozen times.
The mech makes a quiet humming noise and then points to the chart
"Motion. Sky."
And then gives Jazz the stylus?
Uh, what is he... Oh, he wants Jazz to figure out what it means.
"Motion" and "sky," right?
Jazz takes the stylus? Pencil? Thingie.. and very carefully draws out a crooked scribble of something only remotely resembling an airplane. The mech arches an eyebrow and looks like he wants to laugh.
Jazz shrugs awkwardly and tries to add windows to the airplane, but ends up making it look more like a severely fucked up caterpillar.
Mech snorts.
Jazz kicks him in the leg.
The airplane begs for a merciful death.
Jazz didn't really expect to get into a language class but he has to admit that whatever language he's learning now is a surprisingly easy one. It only took the other dude half an hour to show him the basic concept and from there it became a game of associations.
There were simple definitions. Like size, quantity, speed, emotion and so on.
There were signs that automatically turned the whole sentence into a question or a statement.
There were modifiers that Jazz defined in his head as positive and negative.
Positive speed - fast.
Positive size - large.
Positive direction - forward.
Positive time - future.
There were also basic words for senses, emotions and whatnot, also with modifiers.
Mouth-positive - to speak
Brain-positive - to think, but negative-brain-do-positive - to learn.
Huh.
And it's so neatly organized that Jazz wondered if this language was designed specifically to be easy to learn.
Let's see....
Mouth - positive, effort - negative.
"Easy to speak."
The guy nods contentedly and starts talking back, while pointing to the appropriate columns of the chart to make it easier for Jazz to understand.
"Creation-positive. Purpose. Person-negative-knowledge. memory-positive-effort-negative."
Jazz frowns, concentrating on his finger.
Oh. Created. For those who don't know it. Easy to learn.
He was right. The whole thing is waaaay too awkward to write poetry but learning it is a delight.
Jazz leans over the chart.
All right, well, let's see.
“Name. You. Question?”
The other guy smiles and pokes at the chart
"Me.Motion-sound-negative.Negative-eyes-positive-someone."
Walk quietly. searching?… Sneaking?
Oh, it's not "to sneak" it's "to prowl"
"Prowl" nods affirmatively. Jazz smiles at him and looks at the chart again. Okay. How to say “music”?..
“word-knowledge-negative.”
He stops to make a gesture with his hands, as if playing an invisible piano while humming a tune.
Prowl nods
“Sound-positive-positive-hearing.”
Jazz chuckles
“A whole two positives eh? Okay then. Uh. You don't look like you listen to jazz....so..”
“Me. Name. Sound-positive-positive-listening.”
Prowl raises his eyebrows. (Jazz is jealous, he wishes he had eyebrows too.)
“You're a musician?"
Jazz quickly shakes his head while simultaneously muting the outside speakers to a barely audible level and turning on one of the songs on his playlist.
Prowl twitches in surprise when he hears the melody.
Jazz waits for the intro to finish playing and then points to himself
“Creation-negative..uh..Sound-positive-positive-hearing. Jazz. This...”
He pats himself lightly on the chest.
"..is me. Jazz."
Prowl straightens up slightly
“Oh, you're not a musician, you're the music.”
Jazz nods cheerfully
“Yes yes!”
“Jaaz?”
“No no. Jazz.”
“Ah. Jazz?”
“That's right.”
Prowl draws a portal on the screen.
“You teleported here. What happened?”
Jazz hangs back, trying to construct an answer in his head. Good thing Prowl seems to have infinite patience
“So, I uh. What was 'fight'? Movement-pain-positive? I fought these things...”
He takes the tablet from Prowl and draws a crooked blot with a bunch of tentacles on it. Then thinks for a bit and adds big teeth and a lot of eyes. He's not really sure how to draw those eyes properly, so he just scatters them randomly around the monster area.
Prowl doesn't seem to be that amused by Jazz's drawings anymore, in fact, he suddenly becomes very somber.
“Quintessons.”
He pokes at the monster
“Name-Quintessons. Number-question.”
How many?
Jazz scratches the back of his head
“So uh...a lot?....number-positive-positive-positive-positive-positi...you get the idea.”
To be convincing, he dramatically spreads his arms out to the sides depicting something very large.
Prowl looks alarmed.
And unconvinced.
“How did you survive?”
Jazz laughs pretentiously
“Ask them how they survived.”
Prowl makes the “you can't be serious” face. Jazz isn't quite sure what exactly is confusing him. Mechs are designed to kill Quintessons, aren't they? Judging by his movements, this pilot must be damn good at controlling his mech, and that kind of guys usually fight on the front lines.
He decides to put that thought aside for later. There are more important things right now, like...oh shit, where is he even going??
Jazz leans over the chart again
“Uh. Right. Question-we-move-up-place” Man, how to specify... “Knowledge-negative?”
Prowl, linguistic gods bless him, understands him and starts gesturing over the chart in response
Okay. Ah. I-move-up. Planet-creation-positive.
'I'm heading home' or 'my home planet'.”
Jazz instantly perks up.
“Oh that's great, I'm pretty sure I'm supposed to go there too.”
Prowl is speaking in a language he's unfamiliar with, so he's definitely from another country, but hey, who cares as long as it's on Earth, right? He just needs to get there and he'll find his own way from there.
He watches the space debris flicker by outside the window. Even the stars are unfamiliar, Jazz can't find any constellations he knows.
One of the little purple creatures says something and Prowl steps aside to chat with them. Jazz leans back and settles into a more or less stable position. Then does the same thing, but with his real, human body. Hell, his head still feels really fucking weird after that teleportation.
He opens the comm channel and just listens to the static for a couple minutes in the faint hope that the engineering department will find a way to contact him.
Nothing.
He sighs.
“1061 on the com. In case there's any way you can hear me...ah shit. You guys won't believe what happened...”
#mecha pilot jazz au#listen#idk#I can barely speak english don’t judge me on the art of bullshiting a made up language into existence#jazz#prowl#jazzprowl#maccadam
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David Gaider on Fenris, under a cut for length:
"Fenris. Now, DA2 is a story all on its own but I'm not going to go there other than to sum it up as "we had just over a year and a half to make this". It's why I only wrote one follower, Fenris, and although it'll make his fans mad: I probably shouldn't have. Let me explain. The way we'd approach making the followers is brainstorming a list of concepts covering first the array of gameplay classes (and sub-classes) and then making sure they each have some skin in the game when it came to the story's conflicts - ideally having characters on both sides of the major ones. Why? You can't make a player care about the world, but you can make them care about characters who care about the world. It's the easiest way to provide hooks into a conflict, outside of it knocking on the player's door. Heck, it's probably better than that. Players will burn the world for approval. After that, we'd decide things like romances/sexuality. Then the writers would pick who they'd write. I always let my writers pick first. I figured they do their best work when it's something they're inspired to write... and they got so few chances at ownership, I wanted to give it whenever I could It's why I (reluctantly) let Patrick wrest Cole from my grasp in DAI, a character I'd created in Asunder. It's also why I let Jennifer take Anders in DA2, who I'd started in Awakening. In this instance, it meant I was left with the angry elven warrior character who nobody else appeared to want."
"It should have been my first clue that something was up. The second was how the artists had zero clue what to do with him. The art concepts were all over the place - from mages to crows to... well, even weirder. No matter how hard I tried to explain the idea, the artists simply didn't seem to get it Does this mean he was a bad character? Not exactly. Just an idea that probably deserved some re-examining. You can tell when an idea has a certain spark, and part of that is being easy to communicate. Sadly, there wasn't time for any re-examining even if it'd occurred to me. And it didn't, not yet. If it had, if I had time, maybe I'd have re-booted him as a templar. Someone pro-templar rather than anti-mage, who could give a personal hook into Meredith and give the templars some badly-needed humanity. But this falls into the shoulda-woulda-coulda category. I had a follower to write. Quickly. I struggled, at first. It was hard to get away from "Fenris hates everything, all the time". It felt very one-note, and I didn't know where to take him. My third clue, I guess. I also wasn't sure if I was the right person to write a former slave. I did know that couldn't be the center of his story. I did know trauma, however. How it can eat you up. How the hate and resentment is like drinking poison and hoping the other person dies. How it can infect your relationships. Fenris's trauma isn't my trauma, obviously, but here I dipped into a more personal part of myself than I'd ever done before."
"It gave me the center of his story I was missing, but wow was it uncomfortable. In a good way, maybe. I likely wouldn't have, if I hadn't been so desperate. In a way, I think DA2 had some of our best writing *because* of the timeline. It was raw, with little time to sand down the interesting parts. I wouldn't have done the "Fenris doesn't talk to you for three years" thing if I'd known we were going to cut all the reactivity initially planned for the time jumps. When that call was made, I campaigned to cut the jumps to a year, but there was no time for the revisions it'd need. So, um. Awkward. I used to get asked where the name came from, and I... don't remember? Obviously it's derived from Fenrir, but I don't recall why we picked that. Someone pointed at Fenris the Feared from Joe Abercrombie's books... and I did read them, so maybe the name lodged in my head? Wouldn't be the first time. Casting Fenris turned out to be easy. He was the first time I requested a specific VA and got him. (The other times were Merrill and then Solas, my two "I want these specific Welsh actors, please".) Why? OK, if you must know, I'd played a bit of Final Fantasy XII. I heard Balthier. "Yes, that." 😅 And Gideon Emery was a delight, as it turned out. Consummate professional, and that lovely gravel in his voice... good god. Bite the knuckles. There was a struggle to find the voice at the outset where I did my best not to say "just pls do Balthier" but he found Fenris on his own and it was amazing. Overall, Fenris turned out better than he had any right to, considering the rocky start. He had a lot of soul, a vulnerability forged by pain that struck a chord with a lot of players, and I'm glad. Do I regret anything? Probably having him live in a corpse-filled mansion that would never update. That's a hindsight thing, though, as again the cut to reactivity over the time jumps came late. Outside of that, maybe letting the player give him back to Danarius? Poor shock value and a waste of resources because almost nobody took the option. Good evil options are ones that are tempting to take. And the lyrium tattoos. Interesting concept, but they're probably why you'll never see Fenris in a future DA. He requires a custom body, and the tattoos make that expensive. It's why I put Fenris in my 4th DA novel - the cancelled one. Don't fret, though. He died in it, so this way he lives on. 😉"
[source thread]
User: "Wait wait how does he die in [the cancelled novel]??" David Gaider: "Gloriously, after taking up a cause he didn't believe in at first but then made his own, one that allowed him to rediscover what it meant to be elven." [source] David Gaider: "I’m not sorry about the novel cancellation. I’m the one who cancelled it. I am kinda sad we couldn’t make it work, though. Considering it was after I left the DA team, it would have been my final DA hurrah." [source] David Gaider: "From my perspective, it was kind of "well if you're never going to use him again, let me at least give him a proper send off" and the story required a glorious death... but I get that's not the story his biggest fans would want (which is Hawke + Fenris 4ever), so it's just as well." [source]
User: "You all did some incredible work with such a tight deadline" David Gaider: "I'm of the opinion that even if we'd had only another six months to bake, DA2 would be remembered as a classic and not either a flawed gem or underbaked sequel, depending on who you ask." [source]
#dragon age#bioware#fenris#the fenaissance#video games#long post#longpost#cole#spirit boy#solas#dragon age 5
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hi my friends! hope you're all doing well. just wanted to come on here and share a little updates w you guys (if you're still here lol)
i guess it's been like a month n a half since i formally went on hiatus, and it's been nice! i got kinda sick for a little bit lmfaooo which was tough to manage w school, but i'm better now
although i took time away from my blog, i still delved in writing here n there. i haven't written anything for kickoff since tbh i'm in such a slump w it. but i still have big plans for stuff that happens after ch13, so hopefully i can just push through this next chapter and get to a better place. thanks so much to anyone that is still interested in the story, it means a lot to me. i know i'm so slow w updates and the story has been going on for almost a year now, but the continued support is so sweet! even though i didn't work on writing it these past one n a half months, i still really love it and plan to finish it.
i'm not sure if many people remember that i had this sort of "apocalypse" gojo x reader au about an asteroid being set to hit the earth in three days, and reader n gojo are ex lovers n the impending end of the world makes them break no-contact...yeah i finished writing the first chapter for it and i really love it so far! it's like set in new york which is really fun haha i love stories where new york is kind of its own "character" if that makes sense...it will definitely be a limited series w only 4 chapters or so, but i kinda wanna finish all 4 chapters before i start posting it bc i don't want it to be a drawn out series in terms of posting since i think it'd be best enjoyed in frequent succession if that makes sense
as for ihm, i think i wrote the most for ihm during my hiatus. i finished three chapters for it, but they are shorter chapters (around 3-4k words). i kinda realized one of my biggest reasons for burnout w my fics were the reaaaaallly long chapters...like didn't i have a 22k chapter for kickoff or sumn lol. idk i can't remember. but anyways, yeah the mindset behind the longer chapters was bc i liked each chapter to kinda have its own conflict, build up, tension then resolution in a sense. but it was exhausting to write that way tbh lol. so i think moving forward, for ihm, i will have shorter chapters. i just don't wanna think to much about things anymore, and write from my heart, bc i have a lot of things planned for ihm, and among the criticism i've received for my writing choices vs my own vision for the story, i've realized during my hiatus that the only way i can finish ihm, or any of my storeis for that matter, is if i just.........stop giving a fuck about it. lol idk if that sounds strange to say, but like, i don't want to over-edit anything. i don't want to think too much about redundancy. i don't want to flower things up or cut stuff out. i'm at the point where imma just write a first draft, check for grammarly errors, and then post it. i guess the reason i'm sharing this is because idk if this means that people may enjoy my writing less since i will admittedly be spending much less time on it than i did before, but tbh i realized i find the most joy while i'm writing, and not while i'm editing. so i want to spend as little time on the latter as possible, and if that changes the quality of my work, then so be it.
anyways, hmm as for hiatus. i guess i'm off hiatus now? i really enjoyed being off of tumblr tbh this app has a lot of questionable content at times (esp in jjk community) and it also did wonders for my studying bc i wasn't spending time doomscrolling or shit posting anymore lmfaooo. but as for writing in particular, i think i will start to post ihm again exclusively. i can't say anything about kickoff or my other projects, but i feel comfortable to start posting ihm again.
sorry, i know that i have kept my replies and ask box off for a long time. but i will open them again once i start posting chapters because i really miss interacting with you guys.
anywho, these are my updates lol i'm like not sure how many of my readers are still here or which ones have moved on but that's ok, i'm grateful to anyone n everyone. hope to see you all soon again!
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I feel like there’s some meaningful stuff here about Sara and August’s relationship, so I wanted to reblog and lift those up here! Sara has traditionally been unfairly slammed by the fandom, even though her actions were meaningfully different from August’s in season 2. And a lot of times saraugust is held up as this ontologically evil foil to wilmon, even though both pairings juxtapose the capacity to be sweet and loving with some pretty intense teenage flaws.
Personally, while I understand why they happen, I’ve always been a little wary of discussions of “is Sara a bad person/is August a bad person.” I understand why this framing works for some fans, but it doesn’t work for me. Mostly because a while back, Omar was talking in an interview, and he talked about Lisa’s writing philosophy being that there aren’t good and bad people in her stories, there are people in her stories who are capable of good and bad actions. Now, authorial intent can only go so far, I get that. But I do think this is a theme that underpins the series. I think they did a great job of showing Sara’s complexity and growth over the season. I do think there were some fumbles to August’s writing in season 3 that led a portion of the audience to believe he never changed, ever, over the course of the series. I think the show would have benefitted from him and Simon having a chance to do restorative work outside of their relationships with Wille. At the same time, I don’t think season 3 was without growth for August. @sflow-er’s post on the Fleabag parallel does a great job of breaking down August’s arc. I’m not saying any of this negates the harm August does—far from it—but I do think the show is inviting us to envision a better future for August where he grows and changes, especially in our fanworks.
And that’s what I want to talk about in this reblog: fanworks. It’s been a long time since people were acknowledging the saraugust nuance in season 2, and ultimately how fascinating the pairing is, but there’s still only 96 fics tagged Sara/August on AO3 and only a few are actually about them.
I think, what I’m sad about most when it comes to Young Royals fandom, is that there is no fanworks community around Sara and August the way there is for wilmon, at least on tumblr. There are individual people who are interested in their dynamic, and some of them create fanworks from time to time, and some of us reach out to one another and have meaningful and wonderful one-on-one conversations in our inboxes. But there’s very few reblog chains about them where people are just expressing fun headcanons, there’s very little circulating fanart, there’s some gifsets and edits but they don’t circulate as frequently, no fandom events or challenges themed around them, no following and cheering on of Malte and Frida’s careers, (to my knowledge) no epic multichapter saraugust fics we discuss together and swoon over and make starry eyes over.
To be clear: I don’t think I’d ever expect saragust to have the same size of following wilmon does. There are many factors that make wilmon more popular, first and foremost being that August does real legitimate harm and is annoying and kind of sucks. Like, hey! I get it! Not everyone is going to like him, and that’s perfectly okay. And then there’s the fact that not everyone who’s drawn to an m/m show is going to feel excited to ship a f/m pairing. As @crownedwille points out, fandoms sure can do some stuff when female characters are involved. Of course saraugust will get smaller numbers.
But as someone who’s been tracking the saraugust breadcrumbs in fandom for a while, and has been following their tag on AO3, what I’m noticing is not exactly a natural absence of interest in the pairing. It’s more like I see a lot of people who have an interest in the characters and the dynamics, but something about the way YR fandom interacts socially reinforces the notion that you keep your saraugust feelings to yourself. Or, for a while if you were expressing those feelings, you were encouraged to express them in ways that are full of apologies and disclaimers. When you’re spending all your time doing that, it becomes a lot harder to create fanworks. Like, even in the tags of this post, I see a lot of people saying they liked them or found them interesting or cute or they’re hooked in by the drama or whatever else! Clearly the enjoyers exist and are out there. I think the discourse (and the harassment of actors/writers/creative team on social media) has died down a lot since the finale and there’s more space to like the characters, but I also think that some of the patterns of fandom interaction that sprung up post-S2 have had a continued impact on how people express themselves.
And yes, it’s important to be mindful of the morally dubious sides of this pairing, but we can do that while creating space for people to openly enjoy it through fic and headcanons and edits and such the way that many people in the fandom openly enjoy wilmon, even if it’s a smaller group of us. (Heck, some people enjoy saraugust because of the moral dubiousness and that is part of a Valid Fandom Tradition of enjoying morally dubious pairings.)
As someone who’s currently feeling a little burned out on wilmon by itself and doesn’t really have a desire to read works centered on them, but who’s still in love with the broader YR world and its characters, especially my two favorite characters—I am desperate for a little bit less saraugust discourse and a little bit more joyous fannishness about them. I’m not entirely sure how to make that happen. I’ve been writing fic, blogging about the characters, creating ask games, posting pictures of the plushies, and also doing some other stuff behind the scenes. But I often don’t post or reblog as much as I could for fear of discourse returning, and I feel disconnected from fandom most of the time, even though I have some strong individual ties to individual people. (I also feel like I may have burned some bridges at times when I was upset.) It’s a bit of a sisyphean conundrum, isn���t it? I wish I could wave a magic wand and make more fanworks and community happen around this pairing in particular, but also around other pairings and characters on the show for the fans who want those other pairings and characters. I just wish there was a little more variety in the characters and pairings talked about.
Anyway, I don’t have any answers and it’s time for me to acquire groceries for the week, so. Blue out.
There's so much discourse around Sara and August. Whether they were good together or not. Whether they loved each other or not.
What we tend to overlook is the fact that they talked to each other. Enough that they knew each other.
He wanted someone to talk to and he thought about her. So he went to find her and he knew to find her in the stables. Then he immediately proved to her that he was someone "safe" by petting her horse. She misunderstood his invitation that evening but he didn't make her feel bad about it. We know she talked to him about the Felice Horse Selling Thing™️ because when she comes to say that Felice was officially selling the horse, he just said "I thought you already knew that" because she had already told him.
Sara talked to August. The same why August talked to Sara. He opened up about the drugs and why he used them. He opened up about being Wilhelm's back up. He opened up about his guilt and about feeling like a horrible person.
She talked to him about her horse and about Felice. Two things that she considers the most important in her life. She also opens up to him about wanting to fit in. Wanting to "be like him" meaning that she wanted to be like the Hillerska crowd.
They talked to each other.
So like, yes, they did horrible things. They are bad people. But they aren’t incapable of caring. And they aren't entirely self centered. That's what makes their individual betrayals even more heartbreaking. Because we know they're capable of caring and they made the choices they did anyway.
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PAC: "Little Warnings"
(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)
Unfortunately, this is gonna hurt. So, don't read through this if you're already going through some pretty harsh stuff.
When I felt called to do this PAC, I felt that we needed to be humbled and check ourselves occasionally to see if we were being a bit too arrogant. It's such an odd feeling to be called to do this theme for this specific PAC, but hey, even if not every loving call out may be meant for others, every message is still, in some shape or form, valid. Not all of it may resonate with you, and that is still okay~
But I am manifesting that you will encounter this when the universe deems you need to be lovingly knocked down a few pegs~
Nothing wrong with a little loving call-out?
Pile 1:
Cards Pulled:
Queen of Wands, Hierophant, 5 of Coins
Hi Pile 1, if you chose this pile, whenever part of your journey you read this, here are your little warnings you might need to know, so only take what resonates with you, okay?
"Aren't you getting a bit over your head lately? Nothing wrong about being confident in your own abilities but you don't need to rub it in other people's faces that you know you're that Queen B~"
"There's a fine line between confidence and arrogance, my dear. If you don't want to be perceived as someone abrasive or cheap, you know what you need to do."
"Traditions are great and all but there's always room to make new traditions. Honoring the past doesn't mean you have to continue living in the past."
"Which would you prefer being ruthlessly right all the time and be hated? Or learn how to communicate compassionately without sacrificing your truth?"
"Don't expect different results when you're clearly stuck in your ways."
"No matter how much you mean well, if you don't know how to respectfully convey your messages properly, you will not be understood in a way that you'd prefer."
"Don't expect other people to pick up on your body language and subtle hints. Not everyone is as painfully self aware as you."
"Your Past pain is valid but your attitude is not."
"You keep behaving like you can't get passed your trauma from your past then btch out on how cruel life was for you, so you project your hurt towards others, especially towards people who are living the life that you want. Seriously, pick a struggle and push through it. Make it make sense."
"You are not bound to the environment you grew up in, because you have the power to change your destiny. Remember, at the end of the day, only you can save yourself from your circumstance."
"You are more capable than you let yourself believe you are. You just chose to live in your pain when you know you have to put in the effort for you to change your life for the better."
"You are bound by your own self imposed limitations. You are imprisoned in your mind by your own fear."
Channeled Song:
(this concludes the end of your reading)
(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)
Pile 2:
Cards Pulled:
Queen of Swords, Chariot, Strength
Hi Pile 2, if you chose this pile, whenever part of your journey you read this, here are your little warnings you might need to know, so only take what resonates with you, okay?
- "I'm all up for honesty, just not verbal abuse. So be discerning if the receiver of the message is too soft hearted or easily traumatised."
- "Words are double edged swords. The same words that can heal can also break someone's heart."
- "Discern which battles are worth fighting for. Know when to retreat your words when you know that how you speak may bring more harm than good."
- "Being assertive and a goal getter is nice and all, but remember, your passion may be misinterpreted as abrasive and uncouth. Remember to respect other's personal boundaries."
- "Going after what you want is normal, disregarding someone's feelings and free will isn't."
- "Think before you speak or do."
- "Your way isn't the only way."
- "Impulsive behaviour leaves you susceptible to disaster and unnecessary quarrel. It won't kill you to think before you leap."
- "You don't need to so harsh and dominant to be perceived as strong."
- "Having strength does not warrant you to be mannerless and disrespectful."
- "Hypervigilance doesn't mean you're strong. It means you've been pushed to the corner where you had no one to rely on, especially during the times you need anyone the most."
- "Being able to do everything on your own doesn't mean you don't need help. You can lean on to others unharmed too. Not everyone is out to get you."
- "Just because you used to being in pain and on your own, it doesn't mean that what you've gone through is something you deserve. Don't catastrophize every bad thing that's happened to you as a punishment from the universe. Unfortunately, bad things happen for no reason. You were just unfortunately at the wrong place in the wrong time."
- "You don't deserve to be stuck in your hyperindepence and wear your lack of trust in others like a badge of honor. Your body can only hold so much trauma before it starts completely wrecking your nervous system and have it physically manifest as an illness. Ex. You struggle to lose weight no matter how much you work out because your body doesn't feel safe to exist. That's why you body stores fat as a cushion to help make it feel safe to exist."
- "How far will you keep pushing the people you love away? Are you waiting for their patience to run out so that you can subconsciously prove to yourself that everyone would leave you?? You're so hellbent in your skewed narrative that feeds your self-sabotaging tendencies and lack of self worth that you'd do anything to have your negative self talk to manifest into your reality. Stop feeding yourself the BS that (If they're meant for me, they'll stay. News Flash, no one wants to willing stay with someone who refuse to grow out of their own toxicity. No one can save you but yourself. EVEN YOUR LOVED ONES HAS LIMITS TOO."
- "Be a dear and search up the meaning of the ff. words: GASLIGHTING, STONE WALLING, COVERT NARCISSIST, ACCOUNTABILITY, EMOTIONAL MATURITY, JEALOUSY, SOFT FBOI/GURL, SHADOW WORK, MALADAPTIVE DAYDREAMING (Feel free to see which words hurts the most for you and start working on that)"
- "No one can save you from your own self imposed mental prison of scarcity and unworthiness. People around you can only do so much for you. The power to trap you and free you has always been in your hands."
- "Are you done thinking that everyone is out to get you? Hopefully you'd come to realise that people don't think about you as much as you think they do. Everyone's busy barely surviving their lives to be bothered to meddle with yours."
- "You're not as strong as much as a target you think you are, and that's okay. You don't have to be in everyone's mind and in everyone's DM to feel important. You are worthy and deserving of all regardless if you are in the spotlight or behind the scenes."
- "Two things can be true at the same time. You are the Main Character of your life and also be a background character is someone else's storyline."
- "What's serious for you may not be serious for someone else. So don't expect others to adjust for you when you made zero efforts to properly communicate what you wanted to say."
Channeled Song:
(this concludes the end of your reading)
(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)
Pile 3:
Cards Pulled:
7 of Swords, Ace of Swords, 6 of Wands
Hi Pile 3, if you chose this pile, whenever part of your journey you read this, here are your little warnings you might need to know, so only take what resonates with you, okay?
- "Just because someone broke your heart it doesn't give you the right to leave a trail of broken hearts in your path. Your pain is valid but your attitude and actions afterwards aren't."
- "Being betrayed in the past doesn't mean you should play and to toy with someone else's feelings. You are becoming the player that you hated the game for."
- "Not all people mean to use and abuse you. Other people are just good natured and mean what they say. Don't confuse someone's genuity because someone else broke your trust before."
- "Discernment is highly encouraged, projecting your pain and jealousy isn't."
- "It's great to chase new ideas, what's not great is to chase the idea of someone new then cheat on your current partner just because things got bored. Don't be a part of the problem."
- "Don't even dare entertain anyone new just because you chose to be lazy and not put in the effort to communicate on how your current relationship can get better. Emotionally opening up to someone is cheating. Having a work husband/wife is still cheating. Putting yourself in any situation that would cause your partner to doubt your loyalty is a breeding ground of disaster of the life you currently know."
- "If you caved in and cheat now, you are bound to cheat again. If you allow yourself to be tempted now, you have proven yourself unworthy to even be in a loving relationship. In short: you have become part of the problem. So don't expect receiving anything you refused to give. You have no right to the privileges of an exclusive and healthy relationship if you fck around and find out. (because you actively chose to play whack a mole and find out what it's like to have std because of your recklessness)."
Channeled Song:
- "How far will you go just to win? Will you cheat on your partner just to have a promotion? Will you pay someone to ruin your competition just to win? Will you start a smear campaign just to go ahead? Will you drop little white lies to make yourself appear as the better option? How illegal and immoral would you allow yourself to become just to get ahead? Is it worth it? Lose your friends and family along the way? Just to win that empty cup?"
- "Will you abandon your morals just to win?"
(this concludes the end of your reading)
(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)
Pile 4:
Cards Pulled:
6 of Swords, Knight of Cups, 7 of Wands
Hi Pile 4, if you chose this pile, whenever part of your journey you read this, here are your little warnings you might need to know, so only take what resonates with you, okay?
- "Unfortunately, leaving the problem behind without any explanation or letter won't make it go away."
- "Ghosting, just to protect your ego, is never the answer. Face your issues like an adult and accept the consequences of your actions accordingly."
- "No amount of dr*gs, alcohol, smoke or flings can help you tun away from your own willful ignorance. You can't run away from your own feelings. The only way to get away/rid of your problem is by facing it. This is one of the moments in a person's life where DELULU is NOT the SOLULU."
- "Fleeing the country won't keep you from feeling your feelings."
- "Just because you understand how people work and emotionally operate, it doesn't mean that you should use that to your unfair advantage. Stop binge watching those dark psychology videos. And you wonder why people pick a bad vibe from you? What do you expect? You are indeed the problem: the not so covert manipulative problem."
- "Stop using the promise of helping others with their dreams just so you can trick them in making your dreams come true at their expense."
- "You can only spin a web of lies so far."
- "You're not as convincing of a gaslighter as you think you are. People can see through your lies, they just chose not to speak up because, yes, they do it out of pity."
- "Resilience is incredibly admired but bulldozing other people out of your way to get the results is out of the question."
- "Not seeing the results that you want then btching about not having slept enough and feeling like you're about to collapse? You chose to overwork and overburden yourself to the point of burn out, and you're shocked that your health and sanity is fcked up? Dear, make it make sense."
- "Has it ever occurred to you that just because you put in the effort to win someone over, it doesn't mean that they're obligated to choose you? Free will and preferences are a thing, you know? You can be everything and more to that person, and that person is not required nor obligated to choose you. You can the most ideal man/woman and still not be chosen."
- "Don't expect exclusivity from someone who told you from the beginning that they're there to fck around. You can't change someone just because you stayed. You can only keep someone that wants to be kept by you."
Channeled Song:
(this concludes the end of your reading)
(this is strictly for entertainment purposes only)
Feel free to check out my feedback herePaid Readings are AVAILABLE
In all honesty, I feel so bad for releasing this PAC but there's this oddly strong gut feeling that we all need to be humbled and wake up to the toxicity we all chose to lie with at night.
In fact, some things we've gone through, unfortunately are the results of our own lack of accountability.
Sorry if I hurt your feelings, but some painful warnings need to be said.
Notice:
Exchange Readings are OPEN
Feel free to send me some support in the form of tips,
Head to my Buy-Me-A-Coffee here 🍀
#divination#tarot reading#tarot#tarotcommunity#intuition#tarotblr#pick a photo#pick a pile#pick a picture#pick a card#pac tarot#pac reading#SoundCloud#Spotify
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So everyone knows, I am 100% a Buck girl and I will always do my best to be levelheaded when it comes to him. The problem is even when I do that, because of the writing on the show, it is difficult to parse between what I think is actually being done versus how things are looking on screen. And I genuinely am wondering exactly what they are doing and if I am even looking in the right direction.
But let's say they are for whatever reason doing a similar thing they did in 5A with some storylines, like Eddie potentially leaving, Buck dealing with relationship issues, etc. Now, to be honest, I do not like the idea of this kind of parallel mainly because the way I've seen it used is as some sort of gotcha about whether or not a certain ship is happening. So this isn't going to be about that, it's going to be about Buck.
What I think Buck might be doing is he is overcorrecting and thinking that since this relationship is another one that has come to an end, that he shouldn't fight for it. He doesn't realize yet that he can because in his mind, if Tommy doesn't want him, then he shouldn't chase him. The only issue with my line of thinking is are the writers showing this? And if they are, are they doing it right?
I don't particularly think the dialogue is helping. At all. I thought it was cute at first to describe him wanting to call Tommy as craving him, but the more you use the words to describe it as an addiction, the more unhealthy it sounds. So if they are actually saying that Buck is trying to do anything except cling to a relationship he thinks he can't have, why are they saying it that way? Is that what they actually mean?
If Buck is trying not to cling to relationships anymore, then it would be an interesting journey to see him on in 8B. Because I think if he were to try to actually call Tommy while his sister is missing, Eddie is potentially moving, then he wouldn't be calling him for the right reasons. He would be clinging and I don't think he wants to do that. Or so he thinks he is doing when in reality, he just wants his partner to be there for him.
So if he does end up having a brief fling (paralleling Lucy but hey at least he's not cheating on anyone) and realizes that no, this isn't what he wants, he wants Tommy. I could see it eventually being good growth for him to see that just because his life might be a wreck, it doesn't mean at least talking to Tommy means he is trying to cling to something that doesn't work. Because it did work, the communication was just off kilter.
Idk these are just my thoughts on if they are paralleling s5 a little bit, maybe that's what is happening. But at the same time, I would prefer they do something better for all of the characters, especially Buck. Because after eight seasons, the cycle needs to stop. Just let him be happy.
#evan buckley#911#911 spoilers#bucktommy#i mean it mainly is centered on Buck but this is also in the vein of wanting to see him finally talk to Tommy
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Listening to an episode of the @antiquesfreaks podcast where they cover the costuming in The Terror and here are some amazing moments:
"But Ken, are you the only one of us that put themselves through reading the book?" "I did. Because John Bridgens was trapped inside and I had to get him out and if I read the book good enough, perhaps I could save him"
"If you don't tell these men what to wear, they're gonna look like straight up hoochies."
"As we see in the later episodes of The Terror and discipline does break down and Dundy just starts showing up to command meetings with his suspenders out! Slattern that he is!!!
"Victorian Navy: one to one analog to working at present day Target."
"I heard they flog you at Target."
"I was press ganged into working at Target."
"It's Victorian times. Everyone's wicked fucking repressed and they're about to get wicked un-repressed whether they like it or not, and they're going to show that through their clothing."
"a blur of muttonchops"
"I pre-gamed the show for 5 years with gifsets on tumblr to makes sure I would be able to tell at least the major speaking roles apart, and I still could not tell Little and Jopson apart until I figured out they had different eye colors."
"And now I'm Pilkington SpottingTM as a hobby"
calling JFJ a "fashionable boy" with his "nippies out" because he doesn't button up his coat all the way like Franklin and Crozier
The two regular hosts repeatedly comparing themselves to a delinquent class that their guest is stuck substitute teaching
"I think my character would be hitting a fat doobie right about now"
Discussing Jared Harris being obsessed with his own costuming details like all the mending on Crozier's clothes
Jopson's first appearance - "he's normal and they're normal and everyone's having a normal time here on this completely routine expedition." "It's so normal. Do you ever fall in love with your boss???" "It couldn't have been more erotic if they had just had gay sex."
Stanley and McDonald's button grouping on their uniforms to denote rank
THEY TALK ABOUT THE ICONIC JFJ GANSEEEYYY
Also Irving's Sanquhar scarf :')
"the red sweater of tenderness" sobbing screaming throwing up
"I think The Terror would have been improved if all of the marines had Boston accents for no reason"
Also marines vs normal sailors
comparing sailor's clothes to fast fashion because it's not very tailored lmaooo
The canvas overcoats being period inaccurate but still neat because they're referencing later polar expeditions like what we see on the guys in the Shackleton expedition etc
They talk about irl Goodsir's letter about clothes and the many many shirts!
Nive having to wear a cooling vest under her costume since it was real caribou fur and her coat being patched with sail cloth later.
They go into Yup'ik masks which is super cool! As well as have a conversation about the ethics of visuals/information/knowledge about indigenous artwork being shared with folks outside of those communities.
Repeated! Dan! Simmons! Roasting! As! They! Should!!!!!
Reapted! Nive! Nielsen! Praising! As! They! Should!!!!!!!!
Sophia's "oceanic color theme"
"They let the dresses have colors. The dresses have colors. The dresses have bright beautiful colors, and it's great."
"They had invented aniline dyes and they were about to make it everybody's problem!"
Lady Jane in more solids vs Sophia in more patterns
"'A woman could never possibly understand polar exploration' meanwhil Silna's up there doing it better than all of them."
Clowning on how other period pieces never use bonnets and always fuck up in the hair and makeup department
"I found Harry Goodsir's fursuit btw"
"On a scale of Calypso's Birthday to Fitzjames's Carnivale, how's your impromptu nautical drag ball going?"
"It's actually exactly like The Purge." "It's like a little Victorian maritime Purge."
"As far as metaphor and literary analysis and whatever, scurvy understood the fucking assignment."
"I punched in Scorbutic Nostalgia so that I could remember to read about it later." "I have some literature for you if you want." "Yeah fantastic! I love disease"
"CGI bear expensive"
"This episode comes with a heavy caveat of 'go to Terror Camp'" amazing.
THE DRESSTM
Tozer's Hotspur costume and Dundy's Henry VI costume and their relevance
"This is the last we see of Party!Dundy"
(About Little) "Every day he gets emails :("
Bridgler and Apollo/Hyacinthus stuff fuuuuuccckk
"Hodgepodge, my boy"
"Oompa loompa doompity dacticals, don't indulge your morals over your practicals"
"Rip Hickey you would've loved Joker"
Not a silly quote but just a really fantastic one: "That is what the best historical designers do, is they find these nuggets of information that allow them to tell a story with authenticity, both in a way that is historical but authentic to the characters as well." EXAAAACCCTTTLLLYYYYYY
"Whomst among us has not Joplarped to get through the workday?"
#amazing fantastic incredible#my mom is obsessed with this podcast#and has been trying to get me to listen to it for ages#and she was like hey they have an episode on the terror costumes#theyre literally a couple of fucking nerds like you#alright! alright. she was right. I'm endeared.#the terror#antiques freaks
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Ok, nevermind, I am going to try and put my complicated thoughts on paper.
So, about Dragon Age elves being intentionally inspired by Jews.
Like, on one hand they’ll always hold a special place in my heart because when do Jews *ever* get to be portrayed as elegant and mystical and beautiful? Even if modern DA elves are a fallen, oppressed people, those vibes are still present. And even if it’s not always handled well, the struggle between the more assimilated city elves and the more traditionally minded Dalish is very real. The longing for a lost homeland. The ache and resentment and fear that nothing is stable & people could turn on a dime. The isolationist tendencies that arise as a consequence of that. Perhaps prickly and defensive to outsiders, but loving and community-centered to their own.
In short, it resonates, and I always felt like I had room to roleplay and embrace these concepts, particularly in the older games.
Tbh even the Dalish clans always on the verge of dying felt real. Perhaps too real. And I think the main problem (for me), was that it was never treated with the gravity and respect it should’ve been. The characters shrug and move on.
Even Davrin’s distaste for his people’s focus on the past doesn’t bother me. Because not only do people like that exist, they still made him unapologetically Dalish (he even named his gryphon Assan! An elvish word!) It’s obvious he still cares deeply about elves, and he was the only one who consistently expressed concern for modern elves when the topic came up. If they’d handled the rest of the elves in the game better (which I’ll expand on in a second), I think he’d actually serve as a great constrast to Bellara.
But then we get to the Evanuris, constant victim blaming, and the inexplicable white-guilt projecting the writers added in Veilguard. (And that last one stings because minorities are never treated as individuals—a bad apple is always turned into a representive of the collective.)
Choosing to make the Evanuris the root of Thedas’ woes might be a neat twist in isolation, but it’s *not* in isolation. Not when Jews are at the center of every conspiracy theory and often painted as this nebulous, shadowy cabal controlling society for their own nefarious means. And to then have the gall to paint *all* modern elves with this brush? As if they’re responsible for a few shitheads that existed thousands of years in the past (that also happened to enslave them). As if they’re somehow complicit when past games have made it abundantly clear that elves are treated like trash with ZERO institutional power? (And Veilguard conveniently brushes this under the rug).
It’d be one thing to make Bellara apologize—because it’s kinda in character—but there’s no meaningful pushback. And elf!Rook has at least three opportunities to spout those same bullshit white-guilt apologies. Tbh, it soured me to Harding’s entire questline.
And the distressing reality that the Evanuris might make people even more distrustful and violent towards elves? It’s practically framed as a *new* fear. Which is utterly ridiculous when even an elven Inquisitor can state that people will always find a way to blame elves (with an appropriately resigned anger)
And going back to Bellara, I hate hate hate that her questline almost encourages us to throw away the Archive, as if this monumental resource is selfish to want to preserve? And why do we get to make this choice? Rook might not even be a elf! It’s similar to the framing of Merrill’s quest to restore the eluvian, but at least Merrill fights tooth and nail for it. Why is the desire to reclaim and discover lost knowledge always presented as stupid and dangerous?
One last thing: Epler said they were trying to give the Dalish a win in Veilguard, and I assume baking in a “save the Dalish!” quest was an attempt to make up for the potiential massacres in past games, but, uh…it failed imo. How is it a “win” to make them nothing more than poor little props for the Big Hero to swoop in and save? They have no agency. They’re shown no respect. We don’t even get to talk to them!
Anyway, I’ve seen some excellent takes on the anti-indigenous racism baked into the elves, but not one from a Jewish perspective. So here’s me, a Jew, venting about a series that’s somehow still near and dear to my heart, and probably always will be, despite the racism and antisemitism. (Though whether I’ll replay datv or buy any future games is up in the air. Right now veilguard feels like the last straw—the mediocre writing failed to make up for the highly questionable & infurating choices made).
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Well if given how the anime will adapt the Manga, it makes me wonder about the savanaclaw adaptation given how many delays due to the artist's personal life that octavinelle Manga came around and is now have overblot Chapter before Savanaclaw does. I wonder if the author will have time to finish it and given how heartslabyul will release in October 2025, it might take awhile to animate savanaclaw.
[Referencing this news!]
Decided to put these together because the topics were similar enough and I have similar advice for both asks. To briefly clarify the second ask, I believe the Anon made a typo and meant to say "Yana Toboso was NOT involved in the anime's production". This is because Yana made a tweet recently stating that she and her team were surprised and honored that they were making an anime adaptation based on the manga.
Now, about the first ask: we are not aware of what the manga and anime creation process looks like for Twst. Yes, the Savanaclaw manga has had a number of delays, but we cannot be sure if this impacts the anime at all. For example, we don't know how much of the Episode of Savanaclaw anime is even done yet. We don't know if the anime team is going to be in talks with the mangaka to coordinate things. We don't know when the Episode of Savanaclaw will air (and for all we know, it could give the mangaka ample time to finish up). There are many things we do not know, so it would be VERY hasty to conclude anything now.
Regarding the second ask: Yes, it does seem like Yana had no involvement in the anime. This, however, should NOT be taken as an immediate sign that the anime will be poor quality or that the anime will deviate from the main story in large (and bad) ways. Nothing of the news we've heard so far would indicate any sweeping changes. This is equating a past occurrence with something that has yet to even happen without even knowing if the production circumstances are even the same between them. The only thing we know that is linking the animes of early Black Butler and Twst is Yana's lack of involvement. This doesn't account for ANY other factors in production, and it's also assuming that Yana's mere presence makes a product good--and, conversely, her absence automatically makes a product bad. I don't think this is the way to go, as it's jumping to conclusions based on minimal evidence and it's putting way too much weight on Yana's shoulders to carry the quality of the Twst anime.
And that brings me to the thread linking together not just these two asks, but a lot of the anime-related posts and asks that I've been seeing as of late: fearmongering and doomposting. Lots of it.
As I’ve said multiple times now, it's fine to be hesitant about the anime. I'm hesitant of it myself! However, let’s not draw preemptive conclusions or fret over what are ultimately hypotheticals. It’s so far off, and we have zero of the actual final product to look at and judge the quality of. I'm seeing so many people make mountains out of molehills, working themselves up over nothing, assuming the worst-case scenarios... 💦 and again, all of this based on little to no information. I can't help but that time and energy could be better spent on other fandom efforts or things we actively enjoy. It's valid to be anxious about the anime and how it presents something we care so much about, but putting those feelings in a public space paints the fandom in a bad light. It gives the impression that we'll jump the gun and claim something is bad before letting the product speak for itself. If you're a current Twst fan that is excited for the anime, it may not feel so good seeing others theorizing about how bad it will be. If you're a potential new Twst fan seeing this stuff, you'd feel very unwelcome or unwanted. I worry this will fester and create divides in the community... unintentionally creating an environment that isn't fun to be in, and that's the antithesis of what I think fandom should be. I guess I'll end on this note: There is a difference between being healthily skeptical and assuming the worst of a production. Please take a moment to reexamine your concerns about the anime and ask yourself "Is this a reasonable fear?", "What am I basing this off of?", and, "How, if at all, will this affect my own enjoyment of Twst?" If it gets to be too much for you, then please, please step away from social media (where a lot of these fears are being touted) and take a break. Do something you like, take a walk, whatever. I just beg of you, don't allow yourself to be consumed by feelings that will bleed the fun of fandom out of you 💦
#disney twisted wonderland#disney twst#twisted wonderland#twst#twst anime#twisted wonderland anime#notes from the writing raven#Black Butler#Kuroshitsuji#advice#episode of savanclaw#episode of savanaclaw manga
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🡻VENT
Hello, this is going to be a rather sad kind of message, the first time I have to talk about a client with such a bitter perspective for me.
Clients are always a reason to celebrate, with many I have developed super long conversations, others have seen me grow on social networks and I have seen them get married, have children or change their lives little by little just like me.
In my community I am always happy to have good experiences with my clients, because even the few times I have not agreed with something, everything has been able to be discussed and come to a good end.
I have been in contact with all kinds of personalities and moods, both my own and those of others, for a long time and I know how to work with that.
Today was not like that. Today I had to deal with something completely different
I had to talk to a person with whom I had accepted a commission 2 years ago, and the last contact or response I had was in March 2023 -1 year and 7 months-
As we are all strangers on the internet and life can sometimes be very fucked up, I clearly did not make any claim and celebrated they return.
Fortunately I saved they files, and I say this because many artists after a certain period of time close them, send them to avoid legal problems or exactly what just happened to me.
I never added such clauses because i have had 2 cases like that and nothing bad has happened (although never for so long)
But with today I think it was quite naive on my part, because this person began to ask me for changes on a work that had been left with the base coloring, and the lineart already finished.
I agreed to change simple things but I also warned that I was not going to accept more changes that had to do with the pose. Not only because of all the time it took (you can change your tastes, and if you liked something before, and now you don't) but it is unfair to me, to my time and my current pending work.
So I limited the changes to the color section, no different from when other clients ask me for changes once the lineart is finished and accepted.
The person first accepted, then deleted the message and asked me for a refund for the commission, since they was not satisfied with my service .
The truth is that I was quite broken down. Because I had never had or experienced those emotions linked to a client.For me it is something incompatible.
But clearly I am not going to do it, my TOS are clear with the no refunds and the situation is clearly cynical, I have plenty of reasons and explanations as to why, but i dont have the objective of humiliating anyone or generate hatred.
That's why I'm not giving names, I'm not giving pictures or anything. I just want to vent because I feel completely discouraged, because I didn't expect a right hook like that. And it's a bittersweet feeling, and finally I hit the wall after 7 years of work.
It's very easy to show up after almost 2 years and ask for a refund when the work is almost finished, and claim that you're not happy with the results.
But being nice doesn't mean I'm going to allow something like that.
So I'm going to rewrite my TOS to make the same clause as my colleagues, and I'm going to keep this low key and private.
My colleagues will know about name and screenshots, because it's important to be careful with these things. But for the rest, it's not fun for me to start any carnage.
I understand the misunderstanding, I can imagine what this person felt when I set a limit (most people don't like it, it's a bitter pill to swallow) but it's also necessary and it's true that during these 7 years, many people have responded well to it and have even given me excellent treatment or negotiated with me.
I have witnessed at least 200 responses much better than the one I had to read today, so I am able to know, perfectly, that nothing that happened was fair. And that it could have gone better if they hadn't demanded things that way, and in a situation where their actions were not supported.
I know this is different, but my head is now like a pressure cooker, and I needed to let it out, to let it go.
Thank you all, for having accustomed me to such nice treatment, that although today I felt naive, I also felt very lucky to have you to have a bar with which to measure correctly.
A huge hug, from your favorite Pillow.
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Love Languages Pt 2
“Hey, Rio. What would you do if I left?”
“Come and find you.”
”…What if I left voluntarily?”
“Come and find you.”
“Ooookay. What if I left voluntarily and I didn’t want you to come and find me?”
“…Same thing. But also, don’t do that.”
“So no matter what, you’re going to come after me? That’s a little unnerving.”
“Maybe. You are smiling, though.”
“Well, it's also a teensy bit romantic, in a disturbing way. I’ll just have to hide really, really well….hey! Hey, Rio!”
“Don’t joke about that.”
“…Wow, that is a lot of vines. I am genuinely impressed by how fast you grew those, I think that’s a new record. ...Could the vines let me go now, please?”
“…fine.”
“So. That really bothered you, huh?”
“Yes, Agatha. Not being able to see you would really bother me.”
"Love, you know I was only joking. I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.”
“…s’nice. Hey, Ags? Don’t tease me about this one.”
“...I’ll try?”
“Try really, really hard.”
“It’s just, teasing is kind of how I show affection…”
“I know that. Sometimes I really like it. But I won’t like this and then you won’t like it either.”
“Knives?”
“Yes, Agatha, knives.”
“I did not know you were this insecur—okay, right, knives! Good demonstration.”
“...Remember a few seconds ago, when I asked you not to tease me?”
“I can vaguely recollect you saying something to that effect…sorry, sorry! It is sweet, though. I like being the one you want. I even like that you would apparently creepily pursue me forever if I left.”
“…You do?"
"I do. Hand to the Goddess."
“That's romantic.”
“...Is it?”
“It is. And I barely had to threaten you! Agatha, you’re getting better.”
“…Rio, my heart, do you know that, on occasion, you can be very condescending?”
“Sorry. But you know, Ags, teasing is just how I show affection.”
“...You think you're very funny, don't you?”
"Well, I did learn from the best."
Want more silly dialogues? Go read Love Languages Pt 1 or Healthy Communication
#agatha all along#agatha x rio#agathario#Rio is a little bit of a stalker#It is amazing Agatha doesn't get stabbed more#Also Rio just picking up bad habits from her girlfriend
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Hi Cameron!
75 & 91 for the trope mashup please? 💖
Ooooo let's GO!
75. Outsider POV & 91. Interrupted Intimacy
~~
Melanie was, by nature, nosy.
She knew this about herself, and she knew it was widely considered to be a flaw. She recognized this, and she actively tried to fix it.
Her new tenants, though, were irresistibly curious.
There was a handsome redhead who seemed almost normal, a little rough around the edges, but he was polite and he laughed at her silly little jokes during the tour she gave.
His husband, on the other hand, was downright scary, with tattoos and a mean sneer on his face. She knew about their prison time, they disclosed it on their application, but she really tried not to judge them for that.
That said, the husband, Mickey, was a bit intimidating. And Ian seemed so sweet and, well,
It was like a soap opera, okay?
She didn't spy on them, but when she overheard them in the halls or the gym she couldn't help but take note of it. She heard them debate about babysitting, argue about the buisness they ran, and discuss the tomatoes Ian was growing in his community plot.
She wasn't quite sure how the two of them worked, was the thing. She was intrigued by how this sweet, kind man had ended up with such a rude husband.
And then, suddenly, Ian was gone.
Rumors flew around the complex as the gossip mill worked, passing through all of her residents and eventually reaching Melanie's ears. Noone was brave enough to ask mickey, of course, but someone had seen one of Ian's many siblings and apparently, Ian was in the hospital.
He was gone for almost two months.
In that time, Melanie saw a different side of Mickey.
He roamed the halls in near silence. He avoided people. She knew that a few residents had left food at his door, and she knew that he had returned their dishes washed but hadn't directly thanked anyone. One time, she saw him at the mailbox, and she watched him turn to where Ian usually was, a grin on his face, only for sadness to overtake him when he realized he was alone.
So, okay, maybe she had misjudged Mickey. Maybe.
Ian returned just as winter really hit, and she thought that would be the end of it, only for her to wake up one night to an alert on her phone that someone had broken into the gym. Melanie's policy was to inspection before calling the police -- it wouldn't be the first time someone had broken in while drunk, or the alarm simply glitched out. With the snow falling, she wouldn't be surprised if the power had flickered and set it off.
She wasn't expecting to see Ian sitting three in the dark, holding Mickey close to his chest. Mickey's knuckles were swollen, and his face was red. He was asleep.
"I'm sorry," Ian said softly. "My bipolar triggers his PTSD, and the only thing that helps him sometimes is hitting something."
"It's okay," Melanie said. "Is he alright?"
Ian's smile was trembling and weak. "He will be."
"If you want," Melanie said, "i can get you a key. We have a special form for people who want to use the gym after hours -- people who work night shift and stuff. I'll approve you."
"That would be amazing."
Melanie nodded, and turned to leave.
As she walked out, she heard voices;
"Ian?"
"Shh, baby, go back to sleep."
"Ian, i cant- hes-"
"Your dad is dead and in the ground, and if anyone else tries to hurt you I'll fucking kill them, sweetheart."
"You got me?"
"I got you."
Melanie didn't mean to listen, and maybe it made her nosy that she did.
But she felt like she understood her residents just a little bit better now.
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There's something almost innocent and childlike about Boston when he's with Nick. I don't think he ever really had that before. Someone who said "hey I see you beyond your flaws and you're worthy of love".
And you can see how much he needed that. And in his very own way that most people just don't get he cherishes that. This is why I don't understand how people can say he never loved Nick. He did. It's written all over his face.
I guess that's one of the main reasons I was so sad for him. The fact that the one person he thought he could trust and open up to, the one person he thought gets him in a way that others don't told him he's better off alone and should stay alone cause he can't love the right way and therefore doesn't deserve love in return.
I don't blame Nick. Of course I don't. He did what was right for him in the moment. And I get why Boston's behavior hurt him. But I'm pretty sure he did break Boston's heart.
#only friends the series#bostonnick#ofts boston#ofts nick#play sad beautiful tragic by Taylor Swift#my babies🥺#if only they were a little better at communicating#neomark#neo trai#mark pakin#neo did an incredible job with Boston
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↠ Tim & Lucy ↳ 5x04 - The Choice
#chenford#chenfordedit#the rookie#therookieedit#tim x lucy#tim and lucy#lucy x tim#jesuis-assez edits: chenford#They were both hurting so much and longing for the other#the only way they could show how much the other meant to them in that very moment was through a look#Tim poured everything he felt in that look and Lucy mirrored it back just as deeply.#the way Lucy's eyes followed Tim down until she could no longer see him and even then her eyes lingered just a little more.#That's just how they are.#Showing their love through looks and actions#everything they couldn't voice in that moment they communicated with their eyes.#because Tim telling Lucy it's too dangerous was really him saying: I can't risk anything happening to you. I can't lose you.#I don't even have you now and it kills me to be apart from you.#I don't want to imagine what it'd be like without you. Without your presence in my life. And the thing is.. he already knows.#Before her... he's life was in shambles and she came and changed everything for him.#She's been this constant beacon of light and kindness in his life that continues to influence him for the better.#The love of his life.#Just one last look if it is the last thing I see. It'll be you. And your eyes. Your kindness. All that you are & all that you have given me#They held that look for as long as they possibly could before Tim went completely down. They dove into the ocean of each other's eyes#and found something there that was of equal measure.#an understanding of just how important they are to the other.#just how much love was conveyed in a single look of desperation.
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Ulysses obsession with the Courier is a special type of sad to me cause the Courier’s part was so important but so unwitting. They had no idea what was in the package they delivered and neither did he. Neither had an idea of what it could’ve done and the Courier was only caring out their job (mind you the Courier could be killed via notes in the express contract if they don’t). To them it was just another regular delivery to the divide and one that they likely thought would help, just like all the ones before.
It’s so tragic for Ulysses to hold so much ire to the Courier when it really was the case of it could’ve been anyone. Anyone could have delivered that package but they did and so he focused the blame on them and it destroys what he is trying to instill in the courier on a fundamental level.
#like yeah the courier delivered the package but in the end that’s a job#any random courier could’ve delivered it especially since we know in the past the factions were farther apart and this travel was a smidge#safer but courier six got it and this Ulysses blamed them#like I don’t care much for Ulysses because I think lonesome road embodies don’t shoot the messenger at it core#and what people focus on doesn’t focus on the fact that in the bigger picture#everything went wrong because two factions were at war and at some point the codes would have been delivered#and the divide destroyed cause with how close it is to NCR territory it would of been found#like there is an inevitable and too many people treat Ulysses as if he knows more or is more aware of the idiosyncrasies of conflict#when he’s like fundamentally flawed just at the standard of being a legion apologist STILL and just how focused he is on one persons#involvement cause yeah choices matter even the small one but I think Veronica’s quest says it best with a line from the courier#you can’t control what they do#like the courier couldn’t and can’t control what they deliver and yet it’s got them in hot water multiple times#like do you think they enjoy being shot or knowing they are indirectly responsible for activating the annihilation of a community#to me it’s hypocrisy to be willing to end the world or one world to prove a point and whatever argument made that only military factions#suffer forget there are innocent civilians suffering that had no part and Ulysses is no better than the Courier#I don’t like devils advocate and a lot of the dlc just feels like that but idk I know people love it but the depth is just not there for mr#ulysses fnv#fallout#fallout new vegas#courier six#the courier#lonesome road#the courier has very little personality outside what we give them but some lines and delivery paint a picture#like uhhhh undertale deltarune rules ig
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dumping some thoughts in the tags
#I've been TRYING hard okay#I've been trying to buy better clothes from smaller shops#but when they arrive it turns out they're cheap polyester drop ship crap#I've been trying to get more involved in the queer community and be more of a person#but the online zoom meetings were uncomfortable#the discord transmasc voice class went badly because I didn't understand how to use the bot#I booked a queer film night for me and my partner but it turned out to be creepy and churchy so we dropped out#I've signed up to steward pride we'll see how that goes#I went to a protest but it rained a lot so I only stayed for half#I've been trying to use amazon less but every time I go around my small local stores they don't have any of the stuff I'm looking for#I'm trying to be more myself and be more brave but my binders don't fit and I can't use a sewing machine#and every time I speak to a stranger or a colleague my voice goes up#I'm trying to work out more and eat less but I'm so tired#I'm trying to boycott and buy slave-free and say no to Ai and to genocide and to tiktok and disney and nestle and spotify#Telling myself I have food at home and to stop scrolling reddit and got get more sleep and to call my friends#All this therapy all these good choices all this work and so little to show for it some days#I am going back to fucking bed
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